Pumpkin Spice People

As I have said before, most people can be basically segmented into two distinct groups; Dog People and Cat People. Usually, these kinds of folks are at odds with each other, although the disagreements are subtle. In other words, Dog People and Cat People are generally good people and they don’t “fight like cats and dogs.”

According to research studies, namely Popular Science, “…found that respondents who said they preferred cats tended to be higher in openness and neuroticism, while self-identified dog people tended towards more extroversion and agreeableness.” (Before my beloved “cat people” readers go off half-cocked, the word neuroticism in this context means people who are more “sensitive and/or nervous,” according to the report.)

I grew up with both dogs and cats. I also had fish, gerbils, a pony, rabbits, and all kinds of other pets. As an adult, most of it has been shared with dogs. I guess that makes me an extroverted dog person. My longtime colleague Molly Whitfield is a deep-feeling cat person. The Madison+Main-iacs are almost equally divided, with cat people holding a slight edge over dog people in my latest unofficial survey.

But this time of year, when the dog days of summer die down and it is raining like “cats and dogs,” I’ve started seeing another type of person; Pumpkin Spice People.

You know the ones I’m talking about. Pumpkin Spice People put on a shacket the minute the temp drops below 72 degrees. They line up outside Target on the last day of August to buy Fall fashions and they make the drive-thru at Starbucks look like I-95 North on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving. The Horn of Plenty decoration is already by their front door and they bought spotted gourds from Whole Foods to fill it.

According to Ad Age, Pumpkin Spice People started showing up about 20 years ago when Starbucks launched its PSL and last year they bought half a billion (with a B) worth of Pumpkin Spice everything. Wendy’s has a pumpkin spice Frosty now. Pumpkin Spice Cheerios, Oreos, and SPAM are available for sale at Walmart. Truly it’s getting ridiculous. And yes, a brand called Truly just sold out of Plumpkin Spice face polish. At least Truly Hard Seltzer didn’t create a Pumpkin Spice Hard Seltzer…probably because Bud Light Seltzer tried it last year and it failed miserably. 

Look, I like Autumn as much as the next guy, so I’ll try not to dump anymore on the Pumpkin Spice trend, but if I do then I’ll have to buy these Pumpkin Spice Dude Wipes on Amazon.