Actual Lines from the Virginia DMV Driving School Online Course

Ok, ok. I was somewhat reluctant to write this blog, because (a) I’d have to admit I had to go to driving school to get out of a ticket  and (b) my Dad reads this blog and I knew I’d get an earful. (He’s a retired officer…)

So Virginia’s court system has finally joined the digital age and allows drivers to take their “driver improvement course” online, so I decided last month that would be best for me. So over the past 2 weeks, I took the 6 hours of instruction a few minutes at a time.

In the interest of helping you be a better driver, I’m re-posting some of my favorites lines from the test.

This is no BS. THESE ARE ACTUAL LINES FROM THE DRIVING SCHOOL COURSE, rated and approved by your Virginia Department of Motor Vehicles.

I found of few of them funny, but mostly absurd.

What do you think?



  • Do not smoke while you drive. In addition to creating a smoke screen, smoking reduces night vision. It also makes the windshield dirty.
  • The force of impact increases if the object you hit is moving toward your vehicle. This is the reason you need to avoid head-on collisions at all costs.
  • Take note of how much you “don’t see” when you travel at higher speeds.
  • Drive at a speed slow enough for your tires to grip the road if you need to stop.
  • If an area is crowded with vehicles, you might be forced to drive at a slow speed.
  • It is important to continually search for an escape route.
  • Alcohol works quickly to distort depth perception.
  • Most people drink to relax or have “fun.” This is called recreational drinking.
  • As a host, do not keep everyone’s glass full and serve high protein or high starch foods which slow the absorption of alcohol.
  • Some drivers who have taken drugs, have reported participating in behaviors similar to sleepwalking, all with no memory of the events.
  • Do your best not to get angry or exhibit signs of road rage.
  • Government regulation, and all of the rules associated with driving, angers some people because they feel like it is an imposition.
  • When you detect your emotions dominating your judgment and actions, adjust the air conditioner to keep yourself cool and calm.
  • Avoid grooming yourself while driving, because it takes both your hands off the wheel and your eyes off the road.
  • If you need directions, stop your vehicle and then read the map.
  • A courteous gesture or a slight tap of the horn also communicates to other drivers your feedback.
  • Use hand gestures as a courtesy. Never use obscene hand gestures when driving.
  • Avoid eye contact with other motorists.
  • Deer and other large animals that live in wooded areas are likely to be more active during autumn because it is mating season.
  • In the event that you run over a small animal, it may need medical assistance.
  • Always yield to persons who carry a white cane or have a guide dog, whenever they are in the roadway.
  • Travel when the weather is good and you have plenty of daylight.
  • Before the rainy season begins, prepare your vehicle for wet weather driving.
  • The safest place for children and small, fragile adults to be is properly restrained in the back seat.
  • If you are injured in a vehicle accident, see a doctor.
  • Watch out for others who are not paying attention – they are everywhere.